Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

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Pull your jeans all the way up over your head because Tom Segura and Christina P are back for another week of Your Mom's House Podcast! Tom wants to have some fun and so does the guy in the opening clip. The Main Mommies also talk about a local news station tweeting a slur, neck veins, broads in space, influencers with down syndrome, and then share some more of "Enny's Thoughts." We then welcome comedian Brad Williams into the MommyDome! Tom and Christina talk to him about dwarf fetishes, a new slur for tall people, Tiptoes, and Brad's thoughts on the new Snow White movie out in theaters. They also talk about the "Allah" of LP's, short people jokes, the challenge of following Brad's act, and bringing back shame in commonplace society. They also check out some horrible or hilarious clips and Toks! Try it out.

Your Moms House Ep. 807

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Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:04:10 - Opening Clip: Let's Have Fun 00:08:35 - Clip: Farting Baddie 00:10:52 - Clip: 8 Head 00:12:23 - Big Word Blunder 00:19:17 - Clip: YMH Muppets 00:22:03 - Low-IQ Adults & Downs Influencers 00:25:29 - More Of Enny's Inner Thoughts 00:30:56 - Clip: Baseball Sock 00:37:55 - Clip: Neck Veins 00:39:42 - Broads In Space 00:42:28 - Nobody Can Follow Brad Williams 00:49:13 - Little Person Jokes 00:58:21 - Snow White & Tiptoes 01:05:55 - Try It Out 01:09:18 - A Christina P Thought & Ivanka Trump 01:18:29 - Horrible Or Hilarious 01:25:51 - TikToks 01:34:08 - Shame 01:40:36 - Wrap Up 01:41:47 - Closing Song - "RubRub Song" by DJ BOY BUTTER Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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It’s a big week in the Mommy Dome — Tommy Smurfday and Christina P kick things off with a beautiful clip reminding us that fisting is more than a hobby — it’s an identity. That flows nicely into some stories from a Por Osos gay bar takeover where Tom was apparently the belle of the very gay ball. Meanwhile, CP confesses she had a dream that Tom adopted a selfishly sinful life that involved slurping white, kinky clubbing, and hanging out with Charlize Theron. Then it’s time for a call with Tony Johns, who updates the Mommies on why he got kicked out of a local dive bar, his new OnlyFans photo hustle, and his upcoming scene with Alexis Fawx. Speaking of MILFs, Mother’s Day is around the corner, so consider grabbing one of Mommy Christina's latest lipsticks for that special broad in your life. We also get an Enny story about his dream girl who ruined it all with a single turd, and a deep dive into some toxic clips, some ladyboy goodness, and a TikTok buffet featuring sprite burps, gendered hair, buttered bread, tapi tapi, and a man with underwear on his head who may or may not be a genius. Plus Christina presents a dealbreaker scenario with a nudist and an environmentalist. This one’s packed tighter than a stuffed pet collection.

Your Mom’s House Ep. 806

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Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:02:00 - Happy Smurfday 00:08:47 - Opening Clip: Brolapse 00:18:24 - Gay Bar Takeover & Christina's Dream 00:24:51 - Tony Johns Update 00:30:50 - Straight From The Worker's Mouth 00:40:51 - Mother's Day Lipstick Plug 00:41:19 - Clip: Different Level Woman 00:45:13 - Clip: Shopping For Cuties 00:47:44 - Nudist or Environmentalist? 00:52:11 - Enny's Inner Thoughts 00:59:17 - Christina's Curations 01:09:58 - Clip: Gender Affirming Pet Haircuts 01:11:15 - Clip: Masked Amigo 01:13:48 - Closing Song - "Let's Go Water Champ Tommy Buns Mix" by Sweet Mitchel Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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This week on Your Mom’s House, it’s just the Main Mommies in the saddle — and things get deeply personal and deeply disgusting. Tina gives us the full rundown on her recent colonoscopy journey, while a slightly jealous Tom has really leaned into his gross dad era — spitting loogies out the car window like an old Chinese man (Christine's words, not mine) and upping his fart game to unacceptable levels. They also give a brief review of The Minecraft Movie, praise Jason Mamoa, and discuss the rise of low-IQ adults on TikTok, and get into the latest unhinged chapter in the Tony Johns saga — this week included a landlord braw, an hour long arrest, and a little sledgehammering. Plus, the Mommies revisit the legendary RPC’s Instagram for a reboot of an old classic clip, watch some horrible or hilarious videos, get re-acquainted with the Alaskan Avenger, and Tom shows some wild glove art from his show in Oklahoma City. Grab your bidet, lower your IQ, and let’s get weird.

Your Mom’s House Ep. 805

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Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:01:15 - Tina's Colonoscopy 00:06:39 - Disgusting Habits 00:13:10 - Opening Clip: Enny's Inner Thoughts 00:22:01 - Clip: Smelly Flatulence 00:26:36 - RPC: Rebooted 00:36:03 - Minecraft Movie & Low-IQ Adults 00:42:43 - Tony Johns 00:47:53 - Clip: Soft Security 00:49:07 - Horrible Or Hilarious 00:53:00 - Spring Jackets 00:59:56 - The Alaskan Avenger 01:04:49 - Clip: Precious Man-Baby 01:08:01 - Clip: Water Cannons Are Scary 01:09:50 - Tour Dates 01:10:44 - Glove Actually 01:13:33 - Closing Song -"F.A.R.T." by Billy Robot Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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A hole is a hole, partner! These are the famous words of the modern day Dirk Diggler, Mr. Tony Johns who drops in for this week's YMH! Before Tony calls in, Tom and Christine talk about their trip back from the UK, which included a visit to the Tower of London, where the kids were eager to see the torture devices. Tom also reveals he has evolved into a guy who shits on airplanes after turning 40 and then shares some stories about playing in Madison Square Garden, where Redman, Chrissy D, and Joey Diaz opened for him on an unforgettable night. They also talk CP’s desire for Bauhaus to open for her, Big Dad Energy, and shout out London’s food scene while criticizing Europe’s shitty public toilet situation. They then finally get to the opening clip featuring the phrase “Grippy Garfield”, which you'll have to watch and find out about on your own. They also discuss overweight flight attendants, the Baldwins being cringe once again, a schizo lady in a Canadian government conspiracy, the family cloth, and a hot chick farting for content. Oh, also “BREED” makes an appearance, and Tom is so excited to cover the latest Tony Johns drama, recalling all of his recent chaotic moments. Tony Johns next joins the show and talks about dealing with a bully coworker at Walmart, a scary landlord, and his OnlyFans ventures, including his film debut in the works featuring Alexis Fawx. Finally, Tom wraps the insane episode up by mocking a racist white lady’s wedding speech at an interracial marriage. Wooooo come on wit it!

Your Mom’s House Ep. 804

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Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:00:52 - UK Trip, Big Dad Energy, & Plane Poopies 00:07:20 - Madison Square Garden 00:13:36 - European Public Toilets 00:15:57 - Opening Clip: Grippy Garfield 00:23:26 - Fat Flight Attendants 00:29:59 - Those Damn Baldwins 00:37:50 - Schizo Evelyn Montage 00:40:18 - Clip: Family Cloth 00:41:35 - Clip: Farting Baddie 00:44:20 - The Life & Times Of Tony Johns 01:01:32 - Tony Johns Sets The Record Straight 01:09:12 - More Wild & Crazy Stories 01:16:47 - Making Dreams Come True 01:21:33 - Clip: Cone To The Face 01:22:09 - Clip: Dumb Push-ups 01:22:38 - Clip: Well Done Ribs 01:23:12 - Cool Guy Collabs 01:24:56 - Shitty Wedding Speech 01:33:38 - Wrap Up 01:35:30 - Closing Song "I Got A DUI, Baby" by grasskingdoms & Fart Simpson Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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This week on Your Mom’s House, Tom and Christina welcome anti-aging expert and biohacker Bryan Johnson to talk about the ultimate goal: not dying. Bryan breaks down his "Don’t Die" program, which involves everything from hyperbaric chambers, drinking lots of olive oil, and shock waving your penis.

Before Bryan joins in, Tom and Christina open the show by clowning on some rich guy influencers and check out some of Hilaria Baldwin’s unhinged reality show. Next, Bryan enters the Mommy Dome and briefs Tom and Christine on his entire lifestyle process, plus he even even gifts them some of his special olive oil. Tim and Kirsten also grill Bryan on some other crucial health hacks include coffee enemas, sharpening your own "sword", and piss drinking. They also touch on Bryan’s Mormon upbringing, his secrets for a better night' sleep, and whether owning a jet is actually worth it. If you want to live forever watch this episode ya chomo!

Your Mom’s House Ep. 803

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Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:04:48 - Opening Clip: Psychotic Roofing Conference 00:07:39 - Clip: Who Is This Dangerous Guy? 00:08:50 - Clip: Fancy Trainer 00:10:43 - Clip: Fired A Client 00:12:01 - Clip: Cool Dudes On A Plane 00:24:23 - Hilaria Baldwin 00:34:18 - Bryan Johnson Won't Die 00:43:03 - Anti-Aging Secrets 00:48:58 - Clip: Urine Therapy 00:51:28 - The Father, Son, & Holy Pineal Gland 00:56:57 - Diet & Olive Oil 01:06:23 - Hyperbaric Chambers 01:12:28 - Fun Stuff & Tom's Routine 01:18:24 - Clip: Coffee Enema Queen 01:19:55 - Clip: Rub, Rub, Rub 01:24:00 - Shockwaving Peeners 01:27:53 - Bryan's Personal Life 01:33:26 - Cool Rich Guy Stuff 01:40:04 - Dying Is Dumb 01:50:14 - Closing Song - "Piss On Me Beat Me" by Zach Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices